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 Could you have a relationship with a professional liar?

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Wolf
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Number of posts : 62
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Location : Solihull, England
Registration date : 2008-07-21

PostSubject: Could you have a relationship with a professional liar?   Tue Jul 22, 2008 4:42 am

There are certain professions where you are expected to lie professionally - sales, advertising, acting, etc... Would you be able to trust and have a decent relationship with someone that you knew lied to people for a living? Or would you never know if they were lying to you too?

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Kerii



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PostSubject: Re: Could you have a relationship with a professional liar?   Tue Jul 22, 2008 10:00 am

Working in sales myself and being married to an ex soldier (someone who is professionally trained to be a good liar), I would say yes.

I trust my husband and I would like to think he trusts me. Also I believe that if you are with someone long enough and know them very intimately you would be able to tell when they are lying and when they are not. You would be able to spot the 'give aways' that every human being does when they lie but only someone who knows them would pick up on.

The biggest question is: Would they lie to you?
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Nick

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PostSubject: Re: Could you have a relationship with a professional liar?   Thu Jul 24, 2008 4:29 am

The worry I have is would I know if they were lying to me? Seeing as they have to be good at lying, as their job depends upon being so.

Surely it would cause problems of trust in any new relationship (not just romantic, but normal friendship), knowing that this person lies for a living, so how can you trust them to be honest with you? Even friendship relies on trust, let alone a romantic relationship.

Now the obvious conclusion that immediately springs to my mind is that such people would be lonely and isolated, seeing as people around them would have difficulty in trusting them. But the truth is that these people are normally extremely popular and likable. How can this obvious contradiction be? We all claim that we value honesty above all else in those that we are close to, yet people that are professional liars tend to have wide circles of friends. Could it possibly be that the ability to lie for a living causes them to be more likable to others through their use of charm and. maybe, a few white lies? Salespeople, adpeople and actors / actresses do tend to be incredibly charming and likable (in general).

Mind you, this problem occurs with almost everyone nowadays. Lying is so commonplace nowadays that people have come to expect it in many ways and even tend to distrust those that appear to be too honest, and they look for the catch, and where the lie must be hidden (the possibility that there is really no lie at all is unacceptable to many people nowadays). I find this a lot myself. Because I make a point of not lying to people, I am constantly faced with cynicism and mistrust by others who are sure that I must just be hiding my lies better than they thought and they will spend ages trying to catch me out in the lies that don't actually exist.

So maybe the "professional liars" are actually to be trusted more than those that hide the fact that they lie? At least they are upfront and honest about their dishonesty. Suspect

(By the way, it occurs to me that this topic could be taken as extremely insulting to those people working in those areas, having described them as "professional liars". I honestly don't mean any disrespect personally to anyone in these jobs, I am just pointing out that these jobs do actually involve telling lies to others for a living).
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Kerii



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PostSubject: Re: Could you have a relationship with a professional liar?   Thu Jul 24, 2008 10:10 am

Lol, don't worry Nick. I'm not offended you've branded me a liar. I know what I am when I put my makeup on in the mornings. Even my painted face tells a lie.
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